Share a Memory

Woke early this morning with this reflection.

Yesterday, I attended a funeral.  At the visitation for this man, and also the reception, the family had lovely cards with a request: "Share a Memory with the Family".  Somehow, I just couldn't bring myself to write at that time.  My heart was full of memories and emotion.  I feared I'd break down doing so, so I avoided the situation.

Still, those words play in my mind now, and I want to honour that request.  I have so many memories. Writing somehow rests my mind as well.

Rick came into my life when I was in Grade 6.  This was at a time when I was pretty scared.  I had just changed schools and left my best friend at that time behind, as I needed to join a new classroom of students where I did not know anyone.  My best friend before moving was a girl who played piano, and I loved going to her house to hear her play.  As I walked into the new classroom, I met Rick's oldest daughter, who would become a best friend for years to come, who also loved piano, and still plays and teaches to this day.  This made my transition easier.  Little did I know the impact this family would have on me.  Even yesterday, I was stunned into silence as I heard his life story and realized the impact was much further reaching than even I really knew.

Rick welcomed me into his home.  During any visit, he would take the time to ask you, "How are you?", and as one of his other daugther's shared yesteday, he didn't want some "small talk" answer.  He genuinely wanted to know your story.  I reflect now that, as I raised my kids here, I always felt drawn to approach his door on Halloween night.  Rick always had a story to share, and wanted to hear your story as well.  My daughter will especially remember his story last year, where he shared how proud he was of each of his children and that he had just overcome a serious infection.  Visiting Rick on Halloween was not a quick visit as at most homes.  He shared a picture of what that infection did to his forehead, too.  Rick was open and honest, authentic.  Truly loved that about him.

Rick worked for the phone company for 30 years!  As I embarked on my career in 1995, I ended up working for Bell Northern Research, which became Northern Telecom, then became Nortel..  I still work in IT now, for the same group that has grown together.  We were outsourced to CSC and this past year became DXC Technology.  I always thought the reason I gravitated in this direction was my own father's love of computer technology.  Still think that is true, but somehow though, as I heard Rick's story yesterday, I realized there was perhaps a second reason that I moved in this direction.  Rick was a kind man, and perhaps somehow I also wanted to follow in his footsteps?

Rick also had very strong faith.  During each visit, we would gather each night for supper at the "family table".  I remember fondly the stories shared over those meals, where Grace was always spoken first, and I remember the first time I had homemade rhubarb pie made by his lovely wife who has become a very good friend in Women's Institute now as well.  At that time, I had very strong faith.  I believed in God with all my heart, and would even like to talk about stories from the Bible, sometimes to the dismay of other young friends around me.  Over the years, my faith has been shaken a great deal.  I recognize though that true faith is a blessing, and it gives me comfort to know that Rick had that kind of faith.  Rick makes me want to revisit those stories, to reflect more.  I want to believe again.

Rick also shared his love of music.  As put in the service, he was a "little drummer boy".  He especially loved Jazz, which he played at times during a visit and which made my heart sing.  The service yesterday included sharing of three of Rick's favourite songs: Morning Has Broken, In Christ Alone, and Glorious Day.  During the songs, of course drums were played, and it was as if Rick had never left.  A few ministers shared their memories of Rick, and it was so fitting that one shared that even the drums played during the service were refurbished by Rick.  He was a man of service.  It was especially moving when the minister shared the definition of a saint - according to Rick's faith, a saint is anyone who truly believes in God and Heaven, as Rick did.  There were many tears shared during the service.  It was absolutely beautiful that the service closed with a lively Jazz emsemble, with "When the Saints Go Marching In" playing to close.  Everyone around me, and I, clapped, shared smiles, and loved life in that moment.

I'm still humming this now.  I can see Rick marching in.  So beautiful.  Rick's family is part of my extended family.  Rick will be dearly missed.